not every fight can be glorious

Hello, I am Chris and this is day number 3 I have been spending with that messed up computer of mine.

Hours and hours wasted helplessly, waiting for installation routines and filling out registration forms… I finally resorted to watching TV:

Ah, martial arts…

In this one match that was on, a kid who had almost the same name as Jet Li 李连杰, got in the ring with a fat dude who looked like he really meant business.

The Jet-Li kid suddenly seemed very young and very slender to me.

The two contestants shook hands, then the bell rang, and both of them started making weird moves with their hands. It looked like they were imitating snakes or something. Now this is interesting, I thought to myself, which serpent-guy will be better?

Then, two sudden moves decided the fight:

First, the Jet-Li kid gave his opponent an accidental kick in the nuts.

The audience made a weird sound, like a mixture of ooh and haha, while the fat guy fell, cupping his beaten jewels with both hands, his eyes closed tight and his mouth open wide. It looked like he was going to roll on the floor from the pain.

The Jet-Li kid just stood there giving a blank stare, as if he was stupefied.

That fat dude is done for, thought I, no way he’s ever getting up before the count to ten!

But he was tougher than I thought, and so the fat dude did get up, shaking his head wildly to the left and to the right, and then there was the bell again, and the snake moves reappeared.

I wonder if that Jet-Li kid kicked him in the nuts on purpose, I thought.

Then, just as suddenly as before, the fat dude made his move, grabbing the Jet-Li kid and trying to fling him out of the ring.

But it just didn’t seem to go as easy as he had thought, so the two fighters got really tangled up in each other, only to eventually both fall down, the fat dude on top – and the Jet-Li kid on the bottom,

landing on his arm,

bending it,

twisting it,

and ultimately breaking it like a twig,

while the camera tried to get a close-up of the scene.

There it was, that look again on the face of the Jet-Li kid: absolutely stupefied.

Then the tears came.