speaking in Baden

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The presentation was going to take place in a school today:

See my books in the foreground? I needed to get people to buy more of them, because I had taken way too many with me, and I was dreading the possibility of having to take them back home later.

So I devised a marketing strategy in which I gave out chocolate candy to everyone who bought a book. And it seemed to slightly stimulate sales!

Isn’t my smartness overwhelming?

I think so.

And there’s another thing that I did differently that night:

I tried very hard not to use any coarse language during my presentation. This is something I had never given much thought to before.

But earlier that day, when I was in a public pool trying to deal with my anxiety by swimming laps, I ran into this German girl, and we started talking.

“Finally someone with whom I can speak normally!” she said.

I asked her what that meant.

“Well, people here don’t really like swear words. They rarely ever say shit or asshole, and they don’t seem to enjoy hearing other people say it either.”

That’s when I started thinking. Nevermind the cultural differences, but did I really have to rely on coarse language to emphasize my points? Hadn’t there been a dad with a little kid in the audience the night before? And what about all those old ladies who came to hear me speak?

I figured it was about fucking time to clean up my act.

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